I’m terrible at titles

by regressada

ive thought about starting a hashtag in Instagram, #onetake, and it would be kind of like the #nomakeup #nofilter but choosing to take and post one picture instead of posing and styling a bazillion times and picking one picture out of the mess.

this blog will be sort of like that. I’m driving myself insane with not being able to dialogue about this one super weird side of me and I am also tired of my progress feeling slower than the most ridiculous slowthing metaphor you can think of (molasses, slugs, all that).

i created this blog years ago and abandoned it because the name is stupid– no one could remember to type ‘l’arrangiarsi’ into the bar and heck I can’t even remember how to spell it and I’m not going to check. #onetake.

but in the spirit of making something out of nothing and using what i have, I am resurrecting it (if you can even call it that) because I don’t have two weeks to come up with the perfect title–im terrible with those remember–and this one already sort of fits the theme anyway. I am fully confident that no one or almost no one will read this and am totally fine with that, so let’s get this started:

bottom line: I want to live in a teepee*. no really. and I’m sorry if I am being politically incorrect–I don’t know a more succinct or visually evocative way to say I want to live in a small naturally made dwelling with a fireplace and in the woods thats existence provides shelter and facilitates a kind of community that is next to impossible to find –a little more impossible every year since the industrial revolution.

upon reflection, yurt might work too. is it actually ger? I can’t remember.

*after posting this I was informed the correct spelling is tipi. Thus I have actually changed the spelling of that in the rest of the post, as well as a few glaring spelling and grammar errors that affected clarity. That’s it tho. Oh and I added “rewilded natural movement biohacker” because I just discovered these phrases and am busy learning everything I possibly can about them because I love them.

ridiculous side note: I have this totally unproven theory that my brain’s neurons aren’t firing right because I can’t remember things–like simple words, and numbers, names. it drives me nuts. it could be because I had Epstein Barr it because I have mold nuerotoxicity, or it could be because I have just gotten more stupid over time because I spend too much time in front of a screen. who knows? more on that another time–chalk me up as a conspiracy theorist or crunchy hippy wannabe if you want–I will admit right now that you are entirely accurate. the x is on the top right 😉 (unless you have an apple computer in which case i have no idea but you get the picture)

back to business.

i want to live in a tipi. I am dead serious. I think I am always subconsciously –or consciously now that I’ve said it aloud– working towards that weird and undefinably-reasoned goal. future posts will further prove this.

why you ask?

actually you’re probably just running…okay I asked myself why.

on briefly reflecting:

nature. I need it. aesthete, highly sensitive, all that.

community. dear God, I crave community like nothing else. and the above is an actual prayer, not an exclamation.

simplicity. my poor little brain craves this one too.

beauty. never enough beauty.

challenge. I need this to thrive, and so do you but you might have forgotten.

work. no, not nine to five at a desk. I mean works that connects brain with heart with hands– movement and senses awakened and the absolute thrill that comes with mastering something, even if it meant you worked hard and long with none of the so called conveniences of our time.

dont get me wrong I don’t hate living when I do and I’m not a total Luddite. im writing this on my smart phone for Petes sake. but our reality is so far gone from what I call (for lack of a better term) The Way Things Were Supposed To Be, and I feel it SO KEENLY SO OFTEN that it is literally driving me nuts.

so I make toothpaste from coconut oil and baking soda. i buy shares in a herd of cows and drink milk raw. I get disgustingly obsessive about using up what I have and trying to find a rhythm to it all. I hate plastic. I look for a more natural, unprocessed alternative and then peel back and find a MORE natural alternative, peeling back and peeling back until one day, I will find myself living my dream: in a tipi, zero waste, minimalist, organic, all natural, biophiliac (if that’s even a word), rewilded natural movement biohacker probably without any real friends left because I am literally the weirdest person you have ever met. but at least I am okay with myself because I lived out my values instead of trying to fit in.

run away or read on, now YOUR sanity is at stake too!